Friday, January 27, 2017

The Oilers Have Risen and So Have I (not a boner reference)


Oh hello. I know, it's been a long time since we rock and rolled here, not a reference to my own rocking and rolling, not dead yet thank Christ.

It is slightly ironic, not in the Alanis Morrisette sense of purchasing 10000 spoons, that's mental illness, not irony, that other than the opening salvos of this blog, back in the spring of ought six, nearly it's entirety, all of those posts, over a thousand of them, were written when the Oilers were garbage, one of the worst stretches in NHL history and now, when they are actually good, I have written not a one.

 Well I am here to change that, let me tell you.

 Above is a picture of the boy the last time the Oilers made the playoffs. Below that is a picture of him now. He is 11 and finishing grade 6. He plays hockey and soccer, is a hell of a student, a hilarious dude who has been to France and will be going to Italy in April and yeah ... he has had a damn good run so far.

 When Pronger and Smytty and Horc and Ales Hemsky and Gator and Roli and the rest of that beautiful team were just falling short to that bullshit Carolina team (thanks Craig Simpson for that fucking power play that cost us the Stanley Cup) my son could not walk or talk and was still shitting his pants two or three times a day.

 It's been too long.

 This morning we wake up to the Oilers a hair out of first in their division, fourth in the conference and two points out of being alone in second, and twelve points up on the ninth place team.

 Their goal differential is second best in the conference and seventh best in the league.

 ....

 I am without speech.

 Miles still to go before we sleep and injuries could derail everything but this just in (to steal a phrase from Jeff Veillette), the Oilers are 'actually good'. This isn't a team riding ridiculous luck or hanging on to a playoff spot for dear life after a charge through October and November. The one place they have been lucky is in the injury department. Dwayne Roloson going down in G1 of the Final in 2006 was a harbinger of what was to come as increasingly talent thin teams invariably lost what little talent they had to injuries, many of the freakish variety. While this year had been very gratifying the fact is that last year's team, healthy, would have likely finished around 20th or 21st in the standings. The leap this season has been a big one but not as huge as we think.

 The injury bug has hit this club too but it has been third pairing D and fourth line wingers who have taken a beating. While poor Pitlick might disagree, guys like him and Khaira and Hendricks, Davidson and Fayne, Gryba and even Nurse, can be replaced pretty easily. Draisatl or Sekera or Talbot, not so much.

 So fingers crossed there.

 Playoffs? PLAYOFFS!?!?!??!

 Looks like.

14 comments:

FakeOilersGM said...

An old man waited 11 years for the Oilers to make the playoffs
They did and he died the next day
It's a Taylor Hall trade on a sunny summer day
It's a Nail Yakupov trade when it's much too late
Isn't it ironic, don't you think

It's like injuries to your top 4 dmen
It's like winning the McDavid sweepstakes
It's the advice from MacT that you didn't take
Who would've thought, it figures

Mr. Tambellini was afraid to trade
He looked over his roster, assessed, assessed, assessed, and kissed his favourite players good-bye
He waited his whole damn life to make that trade
And as he was escorted out the building by Craig he thought
"Well, isn't this nice."
And isn't it ironic, I don't you think

It's like injuries to your top 4 dmen
It's like winning the McDavid sweepstakes
It's the advice from MacT that you didn't take
Who would've thought, it figures

Well, life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
When you think everything's okay and everything's going right (*whisper* Pronger)
And life has a funny way of helping you out when
You think everything's gone wrong and everything blows up
In your face (*whisper* McDavid)

Another rebuild when you've already burned it all down
A no-trade clause on your shittiest players
It's like ten thousand small wingers when all you need is a defenceman
It's meeting the man of my dreams (*whisper* Pronger)
And then meeting his beautiful wife (*whisper* Lauren)
And isn't it ironic, don't you think
A little too ironic, and yeah I really do think

(PS: nice to have you back BDHS!)

Black Dog said...

Dying. Have you been saving that one up? Nice one!

And thanks!

smiliegirl15 said...

Their luck is changing I think. Other teams used to score against the Oilers with seconds left in the period. Other teams used to score empty netters on the Oilers. Other teams used to step on the Oilers collective necks when the going got tough. These last two games have shown how far they have come.
It could all go to hell in a handbasket next week but until then, I am still cheering and thanking the hockey gods for smiling on them once again.

Cory Klein said...

Good to have you back Pat.

Holy shit great comment/song!

Anonymous said...

Been reading since day one and it's always a treat to see your feed in my RSS reader. Never posted before but thought you should know. Thanks for everything!

Anonymous said...

Well, sure, "since day one" is a slight exaggeration, but don't let that distract from me stating how much I enjoy your posts :)

docweb said...

Holy Cow!!

Welcome back...love to have your input back. Check regularly for your latest but never thought it would be this long! We all miss your stories and insight.

Hope this is the first in many weekly and not 3 monthly posts.

Black Dog said...

It may still fall apart but I don't think so. They have a lot of good players now. That's why they used to collapse. Not enough good players.

Black Dog said...

Thanks Cory!

Black Dog said...

Thanks man!

Black Dog said...

Hopefully! It's been a while obviously so maybe a bit recharged. We'll see.

humantorch said...

Oh come on, that was TOTALLY a boner reference.

Tim Thurmeier said...

He's baaaack!

I have been checking your blog daily since October, waiting for a new post. It's only fair after the last ten years of darkness that you get to report on the rising of the sun once too.

Missed you, man.

Anonymous said...

mylani...my wife enjoys lights out bedtime Horcoff stories read in shitty slavic accent from wonderous PSvita machine.
Pees out.